Proving that blondes do have more fun.
In our handy dandy workbook, there are some eating guidelines we are supposed to follow. Can you guess which rule I will NOT be adhering to?
NO Alcohol
NO Regular Soda
NO Fried Food
NO White Rice, Pasta, Bread, Cakes, Pies, Cookies or Candy
NO Food 4 Hours Prior to Bedtime
1 Gallon of H20 Each Day
Did you guess it? I’m pretty sure my social life would suffer if I gave up alcohol. Especially with Cinco de Mayo coming up.
My brand-new Roller Derby Name is Blondie BackstabHer.
Take MIA PSYCHO’S ROLLER DERBY NAME GENERATOR today!
Created with Rum and Monkey’s Name Generator Generator.
The funny thing is that I put in my actual name and it came back with Blondie.
(My Dixie on the left; Coopie on the right)
Yesterday afternoon, my brother’s 4-year old red Lab, Cooper, was following his wife up the stairs and somehow fell down the stairs and started shaking. They took him to the puppy ER and the vet thinks he had a seizure. He was fine after that but has to go back to the vet today for tests! Pray that my little nephewpup is OK!
I think I’m having one. I can’t be certain because I’ve never had one before. I have this weird lump in my stomach and feel really anxious. About everything.
(to the xtreme)
Every now and then, level-headed Blondie has moments of insanity. During one of these insanity moments, I decided to sign up for the boot camp our company is offering. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, I’m slightly terrified because I don’t really enjoy intense workouts. And I’m not too keen on the idea of having my measurements taken.
But they promise Xtreme Results Xtremely Fast. (Said in a Randy Savage voice).
I guess we’ll see.
Calvary came up with a great idea in bible study last week that is applicable to everyone. We all have problems in our lives and bible study is a place we can all talk about them. Sometimes it gets a little depressing. So Calvary suggested we share the good things that have happened to us during week. So these are 10 good things that happened this week.
1. I had a fun time at the Braves game on Sunday with Marge and Calvary.
2. Calvary sent me an email checking up on me after reading Monday’s blog post.
3. The grease stain from the pizza at the Braves game is almost non-visible.
4. Dixie didn’t wake me up until 4AM to get back on the bed. Normally it’s 1 or 2.
5. My coworker just brought me a slushie.
6. My boss gave me flowers for Administrative Professionals Day.
7. Lunch with BFF.
8. MF brought us pizza at bible study.
9. DubDub decided to stop going to the tanning bed. She’s doing Mystic tanning instead. (I know that’s not really something that happened to me but I am thrilled she finally came to her senses).
10. I’m getting tons of compliments on my dress today.
(That’s my excited face)
Yay!
Today is my Friday so I’m excited about getting out of here and starting the weekend. Looks like it’s gonna be a pretty packed weekend. These are the things I’m excited about.
1. Pool time tomorrow. I haven’t taken any time off and done nothing in sooo long. I’m really looking forward to it.
2. Hanging with Ham tomorrow night. We were supposed to go to dinner for Regs’ belated birthday but Regs ended up having to babysit. So I’m hanging with Ham and stuffing envelopes for her sister’s wedding.
3. Crawfish Boil. I’ll be making a brief appearance the crawfish boil in Highlands. It will be brief because of Reason 4.
4. Dinner with coworkers. This dinner was set up over a month ago and I had completely forgotten about it. Luckily, it’s early so it doesn’t interfere with REASON 5!
5. PROM! I can honestly say I’m more excited about this prom than my real prom. I’ve got a way cute outfit and I think it will be a fun time! Plus, it’s at Cheers, so a fun time is always guaranteed.
6. Having Sunday free. I think I’ll just chill all day. Although, that’s my Dad’s birthday so the fam might be getting together to celebrate.
Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!
Perhaps you recall me writing about the spam I kept getting a while back. Or perhaps not. Well, now I’ve found this totally awesome email in my junk folder. It’s a job opportunity as a Postal Service Manager. Sweet.
Read on.
We would like to consider you for the position of Postal Service Manager for Services Company.
We are seeking Postal Service Managers to work at the convenience from their home, part-time (4-5 hours a week).
The Company offers a full range of services for the purchasing of goods abroad, their transportation, customs clearance, and the delivery of goods to the warehouse. The principal activities of Company include:
air and international transportation, international purchases, export and import services, transportation of group age cargoes, dispatch services, cargo customs clearance – goods avowal and factoring.
Blah blah blah. Some stuff about the Russian Goverment….
Ooh, here’s the requirements.
Participation in international activity of the company. What international activity are we talking about?
Receiving and sending off correspondence and wrappers. Wrappers?
Honesty, responsibility, punctuality.
High education and foreign languages are welcomed. I can see how high education would be need for a postal service position, don’t you?
Employment: full-time (40 hours/week), part-time (under agreement). I thought they said 4-5 hours a week.
Candidate must possess a magnetic personality and positive attitude.
Good computer skills and communication skills needed.
Oh boy! When do I start???
If I need an image for my blog, I typically use Yahoo. Some of the pictures I need are a tad on the risqué side so I turn the safe search off so I’m not stuck with the PG pics.
Lately, I’ve noticed that even the most innocent search words come back with hardcore porn in the results.
Some examples:
Single: I was looking for an image or cartoon of a single woman. The very first image was that of a woman being fucked. Probably hard too. She has this expression of shock on her face.
Sage: I was looking for a sage for yesterday’s post about BFF. The first page of results had (in order) a lesbian threesome, a guy licking a girl’s nipple and a girl giving a blow job.
Hair: First image. Fucking.
Irish: For some reason I was expecting to see a lot of foreskin. Because I now associate anything Irish with foreskin (hmm, wonder why?). Guinness? Foreskin. Shamrock Shake? Foreskin. Snow Patrol? Foreskin. But the Yahoo image search only returned a bunch of naked women.
Blonde: Um, entire first page of results. Fucking, fucking, fucking, bj, more fucking. Hmm, guess Blondes really do have more fun.
Just to be fair, I cross-referenced Google with the images and only the blonde search term turned up any porn.
(mmm, refreshing)
Oh how I wish I had a little mini bottle of Jack to put in my Coke Zero. Today has been one of those days. It started when I woke up.
I used to be able to hop out of bed when my alarm went off but lately I’ve been a serial snoozer. It’s gotten so bad that I’ve had to turn on my phone’s alarm to help force me out of bed. Yesterday, I realized my TV has an on timer so I set it thinking the noise of the TV would make me get out of bed. It definitely got me out of bed. But just long enough to turn it off.
I know exactly how long I can sleep in IF I’m taking a shower. This morning, however, I felt I could do the ol’ baby powder in the hair trick and be off (note to self: get dry shampoo). Sadly, it looked as though I did a headstand all night because my bangs were sticking straight up. And my hair was wavy. Um. Cool.
I got to work and started checking my email. There was one from my boss with a laundry list of things I had neglected to do this week. What fun!
My favorite part was this:
“We are missing a lot of pictures for the Pictorial Directory.
I would like this updated and sent out to the company in an email (along with an updated phone list) by the end of the week. Also, can you please organize this a little better? Can you organize it by division in Atlanta?”
I don’t think he realizes that it would require me to practically recreate the pictorial directory to have it organized the way he wants it. At least I have Dreamweaver.
Then I got an email from this girl in one of our other offices about supply orders. She had requested binders but got the wrong size. Only problem was that she put the item number for the size she got. They don’t even make those binders in the size she wanted so I had to find a replacement. She got the new binders but they aren’t right either and told me to check the item number. OBVIOUSLY, she hasn’t checked it herself.
It’s 2 o’clock. I can haz whiskey now?
